Fix presence bug introduced in 1.64 by #13313 (#14243)

* Fix presence bug introduced in 1.64 by #13313

Signed-off-by: Mathieu Velten <mathieuv@matrix.org>

* Add changelog

* Add DISTINCT

* Apply suggestions from code review

Signed-off-by: Mathieu Velten <mathieuv@matrix.org>